Saturday, April 11, 2009

Marketing 101

So, your company name is “Cyberdyne”. Yes, THAT Cyberdyne. Wikipedia says this about Cyberdyne

“The Cyberdyne Systems Corporation is a fictional company depicted in The Terminator films, as well as various novels and comic books all taking place in the Terminator universe. They are responsible for the genesis of the supercomputer Skynet, the primary antagonist of the Terminator series, and its armies of machines.” You know, they created these:

Ok, so you like the name, its no big deal, you can call your company Cyberdyne.

Then you come out with a product. An exoskeleton.

Ok, this is not cool man. You should really consider better marketing. But no, instead you name the product “HAL”. Yes, HAL. You know, the Heuristically programmed ALgorithmic computer that went paranoid and killed the crew in “2001: A Space Odyssey”. Now in fairness, he had a good reason, HAL was programmed to give "accurate processing of information without distortion or concealment". (Clearly Clarke adhered, at least loosely, to    "Three Laws of Robotics", would you expect anything less?) But THEN he is told to keep the existence of the monolith a secret, so he is required to lie, OR, he could just kill the crew. So he kills the crew. THAT HAL.

So to recap: CYBERDYNE has created an exoskeleton and named it HAL.

“Mr. Christen, I have a Mr. Nostradamus on line 2, he wants to talk about the coming apocalypse.”

“Ask him to hold please, I’m cleaning my gun.”